Mental Hygiene the best thing you've done for your brain all day

New business plan for @AmericanAir:
Step 1: give your pilots what they want.
Step 2: give your customers what they deserve.

How does @AmericanAir maintain this stellar level of customer service? Seriously *stellar*
#sarcasmhashtag

Taxi drivers still using carbons to take credit cards? One word: @square. Look it up.

Weather in the northeast delays our flight from Denver to Dallas, so we miss the RDU flight by 20 mins. So now, Dallas for the night. Sigh.

My third reaction to watching “Blade Trinity”:
“Holy crap. Is that Jessica Biel?”

My second reaction to watching “Blade Trinity”:
“Holy crap. Is that Ryan Reynolds?”

My first reaction to watching “Blade Trinity”:
“Holy crap. Is that Parker Posey?”

I’ll compromise with you, FAA. During the parts of a flight I can’t use my electronics, you should mandate that the people around me STFU.

We asked for Mojo Nixon. They said “He don’t work here.”

Ever have one of those days when you get a Dead Milkmen song stuck in your head for no apparent reason? #punkrockgirl